Ah yes, Vegas.
What is there to say really? Well, plenty.
After much debate, MJ & I decided that leaving very late on Thursday night to avoid the potential traffic (an excellent mood considering the end of this tale). We departed San Jose at 10:30pm. After taking shifts and stopping for various liquid stimulants (just coffee and rockstar) we made it there in a speedy 7.5 hours.
The condo was pretty much how I remembered it (the last time I was actually at that condo was 1999-2000 New Years). 1970's chic. It was pimping some serious dust from sparse use and curious stubble in the sink and pigeon feathers by the sliding glass door. After some quick 6:00am cleaning, we went to sleep before venturing out to hit the town.
That night we decided to eat, power nap and venture to Fremont Street and old Vegas. Bayou frozen drinks were a must (*note, 1 drink is really plenty. 2 will kick your ass into the new year. You have been warned). MJ hit it big with some freaky spinning wheel game that reminded me of vertical wheel of fortune with a spatula. Janet and I watch sample of the Fremont Street Experience light show. After more drinks, shopping for obnoxious souvenirs and pizza we called it a night around 4:00am.
The next afternoon, Janet and I finally hauled our lazy bums out of bed. I had a nasty hangover from too much cheap booze. We nursed ourselves back to life with entirely too much spaghetti from Bucca di Beppo and then walked around the strip a little in the threatening rain until we once again retired for our early-evening power nap. We watched a movie while MJ snoozed and then met up with Veronica and Tracy to head to the strip.
The rain held off (thank goodness) and we walked up and down the strip for a few blocks in search of drinks (nothing like the hair of the dog that bit you to bring you back to the party frame of mind) and a prime debauchery-viewing location. As it turns out, there are WAY too many small children out on the streets of Vegas for new years.
I mean, the websites specifically warn you to be careful of HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF INTOXICATED STRANGERS. Hardly the ideal place to bring a 2 year old you'd think. ANYWAY, MJ and Veronica decided that the other side of the street had a way more rowdy (and of age) population so we shifted around a bit in front of the Bellagio and the Paris hotel.
After finding a primo place to ring in the new year, we entertained ourselves by making up stupid phrases like "cockos blockos" and of course the classic, "move, bitch, get out the way." Wild Turkey (tm) MJ is quite a sight, let me tell you. At one point some crazy guy walked by pointing at me scream, "oh, you are getting laid tonight!" It was highly amusing, if not wildly inaccurate.
We made friends with our neighbors and by midnight we were all screaming at the top of our lungs together. Good times, my friends.
At about 12:15 we had had enough of the strip. We were hungry and needed to pee. It seems that the casinos at that part of the strip decided to keep non-guests (aka us) out until 6:00am. Yeah right. As I decided to give up, Veronica pushed past and very persuasively declare, "we want to go inside in spend some money, you should let us in." Now I must explain that NO ONE was getting past these guys. And yet, Veronica's little declaration totally worked. We walked right into the casino and promptly stood in a mile long line for the ladies room. Ah the joys.
After peeing, we decided that we were all hungry. As a reward for Veronica's powers of persuasion, MJ decided to treat his ladies to dinner. And so we headed to the only open eatery that we saw, Le Cafe. While in line, I made the mistake of trying to teach Le Drunkards how to count in French. Don't ask me why, but for some reason they really loved the number 5, perhaps because there were 5 of us. Except, they pronounced it "zank." For the next 30 minutes we stood in line with MJ and Veronica repeating "high zank." Ah yes, the hostesses LOVED us.
After finally being seated, we chowed down with wild abandoned. At 3:30 we gave in and decided to head home. We hugged Veronica and Tracy goodbye and headed for the cab line. Except, when we got to where the cab line should be, there were none. At all. So we walked. We walked and walk. Past Terribles and all the way home. It wasn't as cold as it has been in years past and there was, thankfully, no rain.
We got back to the condo where we got a call from Veronica. They were having no luck with cabs either. Except, Veronica's condo is quite a bit further than mine and there was no way they were going to be able to walk. With the mass consumption of alcohol and extremely heavy police presence, we thought better of trying to drive anywhere. I wished her luck and promptly fell right to sleep. I learned in the AM (oh who are we kidding, it was PM again), that she had called me back again to ask if she could walk to our place, but I was so wiped that I didn't even hear my phone and at that point it was too late. (SORRY!!!)
The next "morning" we got up and headed toward Suncoast. Now, my sense of direction is not stellar by any means, but I had no idea just how far it was from the condo. We usually went there to play Bingo when staying at Veronica's place and I am never in charge of navigation so I never really paid attention to how far in the boonies it is. After driving to the ass middle of nowhere, we found the condo. We grabbed a bite to eat before wasting some time on the slots until the next round of Bingo started. Just us and 100 really old people. Good stuff. Janet and I marveled at our spiffy new dobbers and watched MJ try to manage his double sized rainbow card. We were not winner, but we enjoyed ourselves so much we stayed around for round 2.
Bingo-ed out, we headed to the strip and MJ's favorite poker room at the Luxor. Janet and I busied ourselves with Texas Tea (hey, $7 lasted us 2 hours). After MJ pooped out we headed home so that he could hit the sack and we could play Trivial Pursuit until 4:00am, but not before stopping at Grumpy's convenience store for sustenance.
The next morning (no really it was morning this time) MJ got up early to do some laundry while Janet and I slept in on the couch. When he got back there was a mass cleaning session and we left the condo in better shape than when we had gotten there. It was McD's and then we hurry up and get the heck out of town, only to sit in traffic for HOURS.
A drive that took us 7.5 hours there took us 11 back. There's only so much would you rather, trivial pursuit and your just not that into him either, that you can take. We ended up finding hilarity in the cars that passed us and other such lameness. Traffic reports from "Jonathan" were of no help (there is significant congestion on the road out of Vegas, nor freaking kidding!!!). There was wind, there was boredom, then there was home. At 1:00am. After unloading the car and getting in bed I realized that I had to be awake a decent hour and hurried up and fell asleep.
All in all, and excellent trip. I thoroughly enjoyed myself. Thanks to MJ, Janet, Veronica, Tracy and the good people of Vegas for and excellent start to the new year.
