This is the man with a plan. Somebody get him a drink!

I know that April showers are supposed to bring May flowers, but all of this crappy weather is bringing me down. Especially when I know my co-workers (2 of them) are on tropical beaches enjoying the sun and getting tan. I am very pastey. It's sad. Maybe I will get a chance to get some color that is not red this weekend. Maybe.

I have big camping plans this summer and I do not want to turn into a raddish at high altitudes while playing. You may laugh, but it has happened before. Just ask Katie. mmm hmmm.

Stupid quizes are screwing with my formatting. :-P

Anyhoo, what's with the weather this weekend? It was so crappy on Friday and Saturday. I was supoosed to take Annie & Alex to the Ducky Derby, but the weather was too crappy. Really I shouldn't be complaining since April showers are supposed to make way for May flowers, but I got spoiled with last weekend's fabulous sunshine.

I did get a little of my outside time yesterday with lunch at the Brewery and a walk, so at least I 1/2 got a nice weekend.

Plus my family took me to the Whole Enchilada on Saturday and I got to have very yummy fish tacos.

Quiz Time

You scored as Envy. Envy 75% Lust 63% Sloth 56% Pride 31% Greed 13% Gluttony 13% Wrath 0% Seven deadly sins created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Viennese Waltz. You are Viennese Waltz! Elegant and exhilarating, you are more fun than a barrel of really dizzy monkeys. You love merry-go-rounds, tire swings, and those office chairs that spin around. When you walk into a room everyone goes “Ooooh!” and “Aaaah!” and wishes they could be as awesome as you. Viennese Waltz 67% Rumba 67% Waltz 58% Quickstep 50% ChaCha 50% Jive 50% Samba 42% Tango 33% PasoDolble 33% Foxtrot 25% Which ballroom dance are you? created with QuizFarm.com

Thanks Caitlin. :-)

The Path

There once was this girl, a fairly smart and decent person, who went through life on a path. Sometimes it felt like she was crawling while at other times she felt as though she were sprinting. Either way she knew that she would be okay if she just stayed on the path. After all, everyone told her it would take her in the right direction. “It’s the path that the successful people take,” she heard. And so she continued on.

One day, while walking, she noticed that up ahead there were some bushes blocking her view, right in the middle of the road. She took notice of them, but figured, this path had never steered her wrong in the past, she could not give up now. That was until finally she reached the bushes. She was somewhat excited to see what was beyond them, but also a little scared since she had no idea what was there.

She poked her head through and guess what she found. A giant cliff. In the distance she could see the other side, but it was protected by a thick fog. There was no bridge or alternate route in sight. And so she was left standing there wondering why all of the people who had gone before her had not warned her of this problem. How had they gotten across the cliff she wondered?

And so she stands and thinks still. Where is her bridge? Where will it lead? What is hiding in store for her behind the fog? She was stuck, but for how long? I guess we will have to wait and see.

Sunburn Remedies

According to various sources, there are many (and somewhat odd) treatments for a sunburn. Since that season seems to be upon us I thought I'd share so that you may benefit from them too:

*Aloe-yes, that's an obvious one
*Aspirin, Advil, Tylenol, etc
*Calomine Lotion
*Marketed sunburn creams or sprays
*Cool (not cold or ice) water compress
*A dusting of powder to reduce chaffing
*yogurt
*1/2 Milk, 1/2 Water
*Hydrocortizone Cream
*Silver Sufadiazine (1%)
*Lavendar Oil
*Baking soda
*Colloidal Oatmeal Bath (Aveeno makes one)
*Burrows Solution- also know as Vinegar & Water (apple is prefered, not chemically treated or distilled)
*Calendula

Now go out there and be sure to put on sunscreen before enjoying the fabulous weather so that you don't need any of this.

Sunscreen

You know that silly song that they played all the time a few years ago that gave graduates advice? The one where the guy tells you to always wear sunscreen. Yeah...that's some good advice. I look like a demented lobster. One arm and 1/2 my chest are all red and hot. It even woke me up last night. I feel like a total moron because I know better. I am that chick who ALWAYS has sunscreen and tries to force it off on others. I guess I learned my lesson this time. Damn.

Booty Envy

Last night I had a girl date with Amy. We met at Nordstrom Rack where I got to make fun of the hideous furry purses. After struggling to stop myself from buying things we went to dinner at Mimi's Cafe and then we saw Beauty Shop.

Overall it was a cute movie and it left me feeling like I really need to learn how to dance. There's this one scene where Alicia Silverstone totally busts out with ghetto fabulous dances moves that make the ladies' jaws drop. It made me wish I had a booty. It doesn't need to be big, but a little junk in the trunk would be nice. I always end up exposing my panties when I bend over because I am lacking upper ass. See, I do have a lower butt, (although small) yet somehow I missed out on that crucial upper part that keep pants up and make people go, "DAMN!" when you walk by.

Yeah, so basically I just have to hope that legs for days becomes the new "it" thing and that Tae Bo gives me a little something extra to work with.

So here's to all the babies with back out there. Shake it proudly.

Fug

I LOVE Go Fug Yourself. It's great. It's like they have the cajones to say every catty thing that all of us really want to but are scared that we will look like a total bitch so we don't. Plus they do it in such a creative, witty and clever way. I think they have encouraged a minor obsession with Courtney Peldon and why o why she really needs to be at every red carpet event. So sad.

Anyway, they have these new shirts that say, "I hate what you are wearing," and I am SO tempted to buy one. I know that I may not be the best dressed person in the universe, but some of the people on there really need help, and they have the assistance of professionals. It's insane. Now go forth and appreciate all that this clever duo has to offer. Go!

Every Woman Should...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

..a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra...

one friend who always makes her laugh...and one who lets her cry...

a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family...

eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored..

a feeling of control over her destiny...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

how to fall in love without losing herself...

HOW TO QUIT A JOB, BREAK UP WITH A LOVER, AND CONFRONT A FRIEND WITHOUT RUINING THE FRIENDSHIP..

when to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY...

that she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents...

that her childhood may not have been perfect...but its over...

..what she would and wouldn't do for love or more...

..how to live alone...even if she doesn't like it...

..whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally...

where to go...be it to her best friend's kitchen table...or a charming inn in the woods...when her soul needs soothing...

what she can and can't accomplish in a day...a month...and a year...

Motivated

Inspired by the ladies at my work joining weight watchers (which I detest, since it makes me obsess about food) I decided to try to be more active and eat less crap. I woke up early on Tuesday to start off with Tae Bo. I opened the door, remembering how sweaty I get, and went for it. 40 minutes later I was drenched and quite red, but feeling pretty good. And then today came. My entire back is totally stiff and extremely sore. I feel like I am hunched over. I'm suprised that the rest of me is not bad at all, but my damn back. I will do it again tomorrow, if only half speed, because I refuse to give up. Kellie & I are alson going to start walking the lake at Vasona at least 2 days a week. Having someone to motivate you and get you through the tough days can make all the difference. I want to be able to keep up on hikes and all sorts of outdoor fun I am determined to have this summer and this seems to be the right kind of start. So here's to getting healthy.

Screwing up

Screwing up sucks. A lot. I hope I never do it again, but that's probably unrealistic. For now all I can do is damage control and offer alternative options. But damn.

If the world were more like Liam...

-We would all be better dressed.
-We would entertain others endlessly with our sarcastic witt and sick humor
-We would be eagerly anticipating, "The Emancipation of Mimi."
-We would prefer the "coffee bean and tea leaf" because Britney does
-We would do a little dance because our hair is that fabulous
-We would wear sunglasses inside

Such are the joys of working in the San Francisco office. If only it didn't take so damn long to get here.

It's Peanut Butter Jelly Time!

An oldie but a goodie
You know you love it.
Ooo, this is good too.

Mexico

I would like to go to Mexico. Cancun, Puerta Vallerta, Cabo San Lucas, Matatlan, you name it. I will sit on the beach and sip tropical drinks out of a coconut. Sometimes I will go for long walks and enjoy the beauty of the area. I will learn to speak spanish and get a fabulous tan. I may even find a gorgeous man to do by bidding at some point. Sounds good doesn't it? mmm hmmm.

-It's tuesaday and I'm really looking forward to a yummy fish taco. mmm.
-I am also looking forward to a mini trip next weekend. I'm going a little stir crazy lately.
-I still LOVE the baked kettle krisps
-I really don't want to read Good to Great as homework for my job. We are going to have a discussion about it on the 20th and I hear it's super boring.
-I am excited about having a BBQ or Luau of some sort soon.
-I still can't wait to go camping.

Wine & Eating

When drinking significant amouts of wine, it is very important that you eat first. All I had all weekend was an apple, caesar salad, 1/2 a waffle, 2 egg whites and a piece of pizza, and most of that was not before the wine. Not a good idea. Bad me. I will try to be better since I still feel a little queezy today.

That being said, I probably will do it all again because while I may be somewhat intelligent, I can also be very dumb. :-)

Happy Bunny

I love it.

Silly Fun

Here's a little personality-type quiz from Lauren:

Here ya go - try this. Below is Dr Phil's test. (Dr. Phil scored 55; He did this test on Oprah- she got a 38.) Some folks pay a lot of money to find this stuff out. Don't be overly sensitive! The following is pretty accurate and it only takes 2 minutes. Take this test for yourself and send it to your friends.

The person who sent it placed their score in the subject box. Please do the same before forwarding to your friends. (send it back to the person who sent it to you) Don't peek, but begin the test as you scroll down and answer. Answers are for who you are now...not who you were in the past. Have pen or pencil and paper ready. This is a real test given by the Human Relations Dept. at many major corporations today. It helps them get better insight concerning their employees and prospective employees. It's only 10 simple questions, so keep track of your letter answers to each question.

Make sure to change the subject of the e-mail to read YOUR total. When you are finished, forward this to friends/family, and also send it to the person who sent this to you.

Make sure to put YOUR score in the subject box. Ready??
Begin...

1.When do you feel your best?
a) in the morning
b) during the afternoon and early evening
c) late at night

2. You usually walk...
a) fairly fast, with long steps
b) fairly fast, with little steps
c) less fast head up, looking the world in the face
d) less fast, head down
e) very slowly

3. When talking to people you…
a) stand with your arms folded
b) have your hands clasped
c) have one or both your hands on your hips
d) touch or push the person to whom you are talking
e) play with your ear, touch your chin, or smooth your hair

4. When relaxing, you sit with…
a) your knees bent with your legs neatly side by side
b) your legs crossed
c) your legs stretched out or straight
d) one leg curled under you

5. When something really amuses you, you react with...
a) big appreciated laugh
b) a laugh, but not a loud one
c) a quiet chuckle
d) a sheepish smile

6. When you go to a party or social gathering you...
a) make a loud entrance so everyone notices you
b) make a quiet entrance, looking around for someone you know
c) make the quietest entrance, trying to stay unnoticed

7. You're working very hard, concentrating hard, and you're interrupted...
a) welcome the break
b) feel extremely irritated
c) vary between these two extremes

8. Which of the following colors do you like most?
a) Red or orange
b) black
c) yellow or light blue
d) green
e) dark blue or purple
f) white
g) brown or gray

9. When you are in bed at night, in those last few moments before going to sleep you are....
a) stretched out on your back
b) stretched out face down on your stomach
c) on your side, slightly curled
d) with your head on one arm
e) with your head under the covers

10. You often dream that you are...
a) falling
b) fighting or struggling
c) searching for something or somebody
d) flying or floating
e) you usually have dreamless sleep
f) your dreams are always pleasant

POINTS:

1. (a) 2 (b) 4 (c) 6
2. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 7 (d) 2 (e) 1
3. (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 5 (d) 7 (e) 6
4. (a) 4 (b) 6 (c) 2 (d) 1
5. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 2
6. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 2
7. (a) 6 (b) 2 (c) 4
8. (a) 6 (b) 7 (c) 5 (d) 4 (e) 3 (f) 2 (g) 1
9. (a) 7 (b) 6 (c) 4 (d) 2 (e) 1
10. (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 6 (f) 1

Now add up the total number of points.

OVER 60 POINTS: Others see you as someone they should "handle with care." You're seen as vain, self-centered, and who is extremely dominant. Others may admire you, wishing they could be more like you, but don't always trust you, hesitating to become too deeply involved with you.

51 TO 60 POINTS: Others see you as an exciting, highly volatile, rather impulsive personality; a natural leader, who's quick to make decisions, though not always the right ones. They see you as bold and adventuresome, someone who will try anything once; someone who takes chances and enjoys an adventure. They enjoy being in your company because of the excitement you radiate.

41 TO 50 P POINTS: Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting; someone who's constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding; someone who'll always cheer them up and help them out.

31 TO 40 POINTS: Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful & practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who's extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expect the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken.

21 TO 30 POINTS: Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It would really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment, expecting you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then, usually decide against it. The think this reaction is caused partly by your careful nature.

UNDER 21 POINTS: People think you are shy, nervous, and indecisive, someone who needs looking after, who always wants someone else to make the decisions & who doesn't want to get involved with anyone or anything! They see & know you as a worrier who always sees problems that don't exist. Some people think you're boring. Only those who know you well know that you aren't.